Sister's Great Escape
by It's Fnicking Awesomeness
Summary: B: What is this... I don't even... *sigh* Sister wrote a story from the depths of her evil, psychotic, twisted mind. Read if you dare.   Sister: You're just jealous you don't get out as much as I do. Loser. This story is a bedtime story! Read it or die
1. Sister's Great Escape

Sister's Great Escape

I padded along the floor with great agility, slipping past doorways. I could see flashes of light as the storm raged. Power had gone out long ago. I could hear my fellow Crazies as I speeded down the hallways. I listened to the fracturing of bones, the trickling of blood, and oh, the screams. How they screamed as the more Crazies took down other crazies, their primal instincts to kill unleashed like the doors to cells had been as the power went out.

My favorite was the "boot-through-water" sound, as someone slammed an already crushed skull into a pool of brains and blood, almost like jumping in a puddle. I smiled and laughed manically as I heard the boots through water.

I sighed as Lauren stepped out. She was a lesser crazy. Dang, I already killed Sean, Kate, Chrissie, Jon, Tristan, Penelope, Ron, Francesca, and Gabby. I really didn't want to get even lower in my levels. I sighed as I bashed Laurens head against the floor, relishing as her screams subsided into nothingness. I laughed again as I banged her head through the puddle of blood.

In this asylum, I classified the crazies in here. There are the lesser crazies, like Lauren, who are more sane than the rest of us. So, on a scale of 1 to 10, she's a 10. Then there are middle crazies, ranging from 11-23, like Tristan and Chrissie. Then there's the Crazies. With a capital C. They range from 24-47. I killed Sean, Kate, Jon, Penelope, Ron, Francesca and Gabby in this category. I killed mostly Crazies because they do the most of the killing. Then there's me. On my best day, I'm a 67. On my worst, I'm a 88. On a scale of 1-10. I've escaped from eight mental asylums, this being my ninth. I'm at level 57 in h***, because I've killed 57 people.

Call me Sister.

I laughed and laughed as I ran through the rivers of blood. I relished as I heard my favorite sound. I enjoyed the show of asylum life. I jumped over dead bodies, occasionally stopping to bash some heads, already dead or not. I absolutely love my fellow crazies, as their favorite way of killing is bashing heads. I'm really enjoying my marathon of skull smashing.

I laughed, and laughed, and laughed as I leaped and twirled, dancing to my music. I conducted the choir of blood splats, ordered around the skull crashes, soaking up the blood. My billowing white gown, now red, circled around me as I danced. So free. My feet rejoiced as they slipped and slid in the sticky, sweet liquid. I spun in circles as I ran full force down the longest hallway and let go, sliding all the way down, laughing and twirling, singing and dancing.

I stopped at the end of the hallway and kept going. I ran and dodged my fellows, listening to my sweet, sweet music. I joyously laughed as I neared the exit. I paused to listen to my music, enjoying the last notes of it, before I ran out the door.

It's a long way home.

**A/N: Sister: And that, my little toe funguses, is how I escaped my most recent asylum. Which _Fang_ put me in. So... I killed him, but apparently sissy healed him to life. **

**Fang: You scare me. **

**B: You are one messed up child. I'm not letting M (our littlest brother) near you anymore.**

**Sister: Whatevs. S'long as I get to type about my escapes, I'm good. Maybe Fang will leave after I tell him about my seventh asylum escape. Now that's a story worth listening to! **

**Fang: Ummm... No thanks.**

**Sister: You WILL listen. **

**B: Stop being mean to Fang! One day, you'll wake up and he'll have hung himself in your closet with a Nerds Rope- the delicious way to commit suici- STOP BITING MY ARM, SISTER!**

**SISTER: I CAN'THELP IT! I forgot to bite someone in my recent escape! Gotta bite something! LOL, you typed "stop being mean to Fag!" at first. Hypocrite. Even you see the truth. He also doesn't deserve to be killed deliciously. He deserves a torcherous death, slowly killed, dripping blood, ahhhh. Beautiful.**

**Fang: O.o *whispers* Help... me...**

**Sister: Tried that. No one helps you. They only make the voices worse.**

**B: Okay, we all know you're bat-s**t crazy, Sister. Now can we go to bed?**

**Sister: Time also makes voices worse. They slowly get stronger and take over for short periods. I know from experience. Well, I have to go. Some nice people looking like Jesus in white coats say they want to talk to me. Guess I gotta sharpen my knife. I freakin hate those stupid straight jackets. They really cut off circulation. REVIEW OR DIE! This also may turn into an eight-shot, one for each asylum escape. This is so fun. Sharing these beautiful stories with my lovely little toe funguses.**


	2. Sister's Great Escape, First Asylum

My First Asylum

I silently waited. I had been in this padded cell for months now. I fidgeted with my gown and rocked back and forth, muttering. _Kill them soon!_ Yes, soon, soon. **When they come, we kill.** I nodded along with them. They had always been so good to me. My friends would never hurt me. Especially not like my sissy. Locking me up in this bad place. My friends were growing stronger, yes, disliking the padded walls. But I would soon be free.

"Lunchtime!" a lady said. I snapped up my head and she flinched. I smiled evilly and laughed. She tentatively creeped forward, like I was some sort of terrified animal. I think we know who's the scared little beastie here. I clenched the foot long shard of glass from my recent escape plan. They had just barely caught my foot and drug me back through the window. But I like glass. So I took a souvenir. She placed the food down and took out a notepad. I noticed she forgot to lock the door. I ate the food. "Now, how are you feeling today?" lady asked. _SHUT UP!_ Shut your face! **I hate you!** I hissed at her and clenched my teeth.

With movements like a predator, I stalked forwards. I kicked her face back and stabbed her in the heart. I then ran out the door, the bloodstained glass clenched in my hand. As I ran, I unlocked all the other top-security rooms. It was like a parade, me and my fellow friends, running through the halls. _But we are your true friends._ Yes, you must never forget that. **Yes, who has been so good to you?** I smiled and nodded. They treat me so well. Then the lights came on.

Red lights blinked and flashed, an alarm whirring, and a voice coming out of the speakers. ATTENTION! THE TOP-SECURITY VAULTS HAVE BEEN OPENED! BLOCK ALL EXITS! I hissed again and spat. I shook my head. The only voices I need are my friends. _Let us have fun!_ Yeees, it is our turn. **We want to enjoy this too!** And like the flick of a light switch, everything was heightened. My friends have control. But they would never hurt me. My speed and strength was increased, my eyes clearer, nose sharpened, ears sensitive.

Then came the guards. We all leaped at the same time, my parade taking flight, kicking heads, scratching necks and arms, biting legs. I stabbed and bit, even crushing skulls against the floor. The crushed skulls made happy sounds when I banged and banged through blood. Like jumping in a puddle. I laughed as I bit through flesh and scratched a neck, tearing out chunks of flesh and spitting it on the floor.

One by one, the guards fell. I pushed open the doors, my bloodstained feet dancing in the grass. _Ah, that was wonderful._ Haven't had that much fun in months. **Yea, ever since that military escapade, I've been hungry for some real fighting.** I could feel it as my senses dimmed. I happily ran around in the grass, singing and dancing, watching the awesome movie that just happened over and over again. _Let's go home._ Yes, home. **Go home. **I hotwired an SUV and took off.

It's a long way home.

**A/N: Sister: And thus, my little scissors, is how I escaped my first mental asylum. That's when the voices are strongest. They slowly fade. But they get stronger first. Like I said, time makes them stronger.**

**Me: Jesus Christ what on earth is wrong with you?**

**Fang: This is even more reason why I NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE!**

**Sister: I would like to see you try. I can clip your wings and use my connections to buy extra strong steel chains and tie you to the chimney again. Not to mention the shock collar you still have.**

**Me: *head wall***

**Sister: Don't hurt the wall. Review please. I SAID PLEASE SO **_**DO IT!**_ **Later.**


	3. Facebook Page!

Hey everyone! I just wanted to let everyone know that I have created a Facebook page, so go and like it right now!

You'll receive funny quotes and sayings, crazy sh*t that happens to us, updates on stories, hints to upcoming stories, polls, and another way to ask me questions and talk to me!

Just search It's Fnicking Awesomeness- it's the only one!

P.S. Names and such will not be used creepily/scarily/for spamming/etc.


	4. Tumblr Blog!

Hello MR Fans! This is an announcement that I have created a Tumblr blog. Not just any Tumblr blog- a Maximum Ride role play group blog.

What this means is you can go on Tumblr, and message me as a MR character (or an OC- I don't care) and our characters can talk, interact, and have adventures and stuff.

I know it sounds kinda dumb, but trust me- it's not. I'm already part of an Avengers role play group, and it's so much fun writing as your favourite character while interacting with your other favourite characters.

For an example of an amazing role play group, go here (no spaces, obviously): kneel-to-your-king. tumblr

So, what I would like you guys to do, is go on Tumblr and create an account of a MR character (or make your own mutant, white coat, or whatever!) and then message and follow me at 'please-do-not-fang-bang' (I'm a Fang, hehe). Then send me an ask, and out characters will do stuff!

If you already have a Tumblr, you can still interact with me as that, or just make another one using a different email (I, for one, have three different accounts :3).

I have never seen anything like this for the Maximum Ride fandom, so I think it could be really big and could be so much fun! Thanks so much!


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